Rebecca and I just launched a new site highlighting the different services we offer. As we were building it, I made a decision that surprised me — I decided to offer personal and spiritual coaching services. This has been developing for some time, and for many years I’ve been doing coaching for free. The only reason I hadn’t offered these services professionally is that I felt a resistance to charging money for them.
Since Zen-Inspired Self Development launched in 2006, I’ve had no ads and nothing for sale on this site. The reason for this is that I wanted to keep the site as clear and directed as possible, without distractions. I’ve also had a resistance to people who charge money for lessons on Awakening — or anything, for that matter, of a ’spiritual’ nature.
Why This Resistance?
A good friend of mine has been challenging me on this particular resistance. Why this resistance, she asked? And she’s urged me to re-think my ideas regarding money.
The problem is that I don’t particularly like money. As a hopeless idealist, I can imagine a world where everyone gives to each other freely. Too often, I’ve seen money act as a force to encourage people to toss aside their ideals, and people surely don’t need any more encouragement to create conflict-based actions. When it comes to things of a spiritual nature, which often claim that money is irrelevant to happiness or fulfillment (or whatever the spiritual path is offering), it’s always seemed odd that the purveyors of this spiritual information are busy getting rich on their offerings. The whole affair always left me feeling that there must be a better way to do things.
Examining Money
Though I still hold that the world might be better off money-free, at the moment money is a powerful force in our culture, and unless I feel I can change that, I felt it might be good to find a way to work creatively within the current context. Like a sword that can be an object of beauty or a tool of violence, money can work for bane or boon. Plenty of bloggers and coaches I greatly respect are charging for their services, and they’re helping a lot of people out in the process. This is because of two of money’s positive aspects – it encourages relationships and builds a sense of commitment.
Building a Sense of Commitment
Take coaching, for instance. There are times when a coach might ask you a question that you’d rather not answer — a question that shakes your core and encourages you to examine a long-buried belief pattern. If you are getting those coaching services for free, it’s very easy to simply not pick up the phone or type an email back. But when you have three coaching sessions left that you’ve already paid for, there is additional incentive to confront that question and do some real self-examination.
In effect, money can create a sense of pre-commitment, which can increase our tendency to follow through with our actions.
In all of my years of offering various services, whether it’s teaching martial arts, wilderness survival, or Middle Eastern drumming, I’ve found that when I offer services for free, I get a low turn-out and low retention rate. When I charge money, I get a high turn-out and high retention rate. This has been quite surprising to me, though I think I’m coming to understand this aspect of human psychology — it has to do with perceived value.
Encouraging Relationships
Another positive aspect of money is that it can encourage relationships. In other words, it sets up a system whereby one person is aware of another person’s services, and for most modern minds, having money in the equation adds a legitimacy to a person’s offerings. Sometimes putting our sign out and offering a service can create new relationships, bringing people together who otherwise might not have taken the time to sit down and see how they might enrich each others’ lives.
A Childhood Dream
In my childhood, I always dreamed of finding a martial arts master like the ones I saw in the movies — to gain entrance to her teachings, I’d have to wait outside the monastery for eight days with no food, and then I’d have to go through a series of rigorous tests to be admitted. Obviously there was no ‘$59.95 a month’ charge. I paid for my training with devotion.
For whatever reason (perhaps it’s of my own making! =), I haven’t found that ideal to be a reality in today’s world. An exchange of money seems to be ‘just the thing’ to create a feeling of balanced give-and-take, and perhaps the important thing is that the exchange is made in a spirit of honor. Though I’m charging for my coaching services, I’m doing so with the understanding that I’ll be giving my whole heart into the services I’m offering — and I trust that those who engage my services will find great value in their investment — value worth many times more than the dollars that were exchanged.
Spiritual Coaching
I’m quite excited about this. I’m offering these ‘Virtual Dokusan‘ services in one-month packages. My intent is to create an environment wherein you can ask any questions you like and get personal responses that are relevant to your unique journey toward Awakening. You can get details by visiting here.
Although the spiritual coaching will probably be mostly via email, I’m also offering phone, in-person, and I-M based services — you can learn more at www.kandrcreative.com.
Since I’m still exploring this issue of charging for these sorts of things, I’d love to hear what you think — do you feel that it is alright to charge for self-development, spiritual, or Awakening-based guidance? Why or why not? I’d greatly value your opinions and feedback =)
Most importantly, I’m looking forward to exploring this new opportunity with you. Although this blog can be a tremendous resource for ‘pointing’ toward Awakening, I’ve found that there is nothing like personal, one-on-one communication. I’d love to hear from you to begin our journey!
Hugs,
Kenton
Hi Kenton,
My knee-jerk reaction to your new endeavor is…be very aware, Kenton, of how this will affect you and your own growth. Writing of your experiences has been great for you and I look forward to reading about your latest insights. Beware of taking on paying customers. Yes, it may make more of a commitment on their part…but it also makes for responsibility on your part. Most will expect some sort of pay-back for their bucks. If they don’t get the results they think they should be getting, they will drag you down.
There are much better ways to make money, if that’s what you want, and still hold on to your personal freedom.
There, I’ve given my negative thoughts…To end on a positive note…Best of luck, Kenton. I’m sure things will work out for the best, no matter which direction you take. It always does.
Tim
Hello Tim!
Thanks for the input! You’ve brought up something very interesting, in that putting money into the equation can create a sense of expectation.
This isn’t really about making money so much as exploring this idea of how we humans incorporate money into our lives, and your comment is exactly what I was hoping for — an exploration of that topic. I’d like to think that there are truly positive ways to incorporate money into our lives — the question is whether we should mix money with our true passions. On one hand, it makes sense to make our ‘work’ our ‘passion’, and for many that means doing something you truly love when it comes to work. On the other hand, I’ve heard people complain that something that was once a passion became dull and dreary for them after they made it into their ‘job’, since the sense of obligation we often feel toward our ‘work’ wasn’t in line with the spontaneity necessary for passionate feelings.
I must admit that another aspect of this for me is the challenge — I consider awakening something that we should be able to take into any circumstances in our lives. Writing this blog has been ‘easy’ in the sense that communication is relatively one-way. Outside of comments and email and occasional phone conversation with a reader, it consists mostly of me writing articles. This new adventure will open doors to put me in more direct communication with readers — and will allow me see how I hold up as money’s ‘negative’ aspects become more apparent.
Thanks again for writing, Tim — I always value your comments =)
Sweetwater,
Kenton
Hi Kenton,
The C-word. Coaching that is.
Yeah, the money thing is a complication. You’re right in that people don’t put value on free services or things. A marketing expert advised me that I should sell my books for five times the price because people put value according to price.
I watched a documentary about an isolated tribe in Brazil which had no concept of money. It’s a very happy tribe.
You have a nice, clear way about you. I wish you the best.
k
Hi Kenton!
My gut reaction is simple: FINALLY!!
Really, you’re doing the right thing. Actually, I’d go so far as to say that this is not only a natural progression of the giving and sharing you’ve dedicated your adult life to, but it is borderlining to a duty of yours. I know you’d never make any claims of enlightenment or any such sillyness but the fact remains; you posess Knowing of the kind which is of benefit to all beings and as such it *must* be shared.
Through your blog and other projects, you’ve done a fine job at this – to the great benefit of myself and your other readers. However, as you say, and as we all know, we just unfold much more effectively when meeting eachother one-to-one. Since even great teachers are still humans with highly ordinary needs – such as housing, food and a degree of personal freedom (only that liberated beings don’t cling to these needs..) – and money is the means by which all of this is accquired in contemporary society, it makes perfect sense that money is exchanged for their services. In fact, there’s nothing new about this; spiritual ‘professionals’ (monks, gurus etc) have often relied on the generosity of their peers for their sustainance. The only real difference is that with the complex economics of contemporary society, the modern teacher just need to be even more mindful when handling money than their predecessors, because the modern economy is more ’sticky’; more prone to be entangled by in the form of attachment or repulsion.
Tim Shape has a very good point but I’m sure you will heed his warning and proceed with great care and mindfullness. Surely, there will be challenges in the form of doubts and so forth, but in the end, I’m certain that this new endeavour is a just one and is fundamentally an expression love which will benefit all beings.
The best of luck Kenton!! (and I may take you up on your services if it’s meant to be!)
Dearest Magnus,
I love the viewpoint you bring to this. While I can see both aspects (as I wrote above to Tim) regarding bringing your passion into your work, I’d like to think that we can all successfully merge the two. I think that things grow sour when we allow work (or any action, for that matter) to become a action that we do ‘because’, instead of an action that we Fully Are. With this current arrangement, I hope that I can continue to bring the blog’s free content to readers, and also be more available for those who want a personal experience.
The biggest balance point for me when it comes to money comes from the part of me that would like to just run away into the woods and eat berries and roots. I lived that life for awhile, so I do feel that a money-less life is possible. And yet, if I want to reach out and help others with my writing, it’s becoming more and more necessary to use things like blogs and social networking. Those life elements fit in with the money-side of life.
I think what struck me most was your observations regarding the role of money historically as compared to today. The heart is the same, but it may very well be ’stickier’ today, as you describe. All the more reason to find positive ways to dance with it! I greatly appreciate your encouragement — that’s a fabulous way to approach any aspect of life.
Thanks as always for your input, Magnus =)
Hugs,
Kenton
Dear Kaushik,
I’d love to watch that documentary if you can recall any more info about it. You, of course, are one of the bloggers I was referring to who I respect and who also charges for some aspect of their teachings. It’s not only interesting to wonder whether people will tend to purchase more of your books if they are more expensive, but also whether they might invest more time and concentration into the reading after making a larger investment. Perhaps that would be a good subject for a psychological study — do people retain more from reading an expensive book or a cheap book?
I’d like to think that you’re doing just right at the moment, Kaushik — you are offering your insight for free on your blog, but are giving people a more in-depth opportunity through the books. That fellow who does Zen Habits has made some collections of blog posts and put them into e-book format — which is something I’ve thought about. These blogs become so immense that it might be nice for readers to have blog authors collect posts that are connected and put them into a more organized form =)
Lots of thoughts . . .
Sweetwater,
Kenton
Hi Kenton,
I don’t recall the documentary; however, you may want check out Charles Eisentstein’s Ascent of Humanity (http://www.ascentofhumanity.com/chapter2-7.php). In it he talks about the Piraha, a different untouched tribe in Brazil–it’s very interesting.
Kenton, I went through 18 months of turmoil while awakening and your writing and wisdom was a great help.
There is a conflict that comes up. Should we charge to help people awaken? The way I look at it is that my writing is just as helpful to me as it is to others. So the articles are free. I charge for the books which has the same information, but consolidated and better organized. Further, if those who cannot afford to pay have to simply ask for the books. There are no questions.
And what you say is true. The world today is conglomerate of distraction. Payment is commitment.
I suggest you don’t have to think hard about this. Do what you feel is right. You can always adjust.
K
Thanks for that link, Kaushik. I’ll check it out. And I’m happy to know that my writings made a difference in your life =)
Sweetwater,
Kenton